Are The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Stars Jessi and Jordan Ngatikaura Still Together?

Warning: This post contains spoilers for Hulu’s The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season 3.

In The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season 3, Jessi and Jordan Ngatikaura candidly address major issues in their marriage.

Amid ongoing speculation last season, Jessi, 33, admits that she had an emotional affair with Marciano Brunette, a cast member of the Hulu show Vanderpump Villa. Jessi also tells her costars that there have been other problems in her relationship with Jordan, whom she married in October 2020, accusing him of “emotional abuse.”

“I would say we both made mistakes for sure,” Jessi told PEOPLE of her relationship with Jordan before the season premiered. “Mine being the affair and his being the emotional abuse, but I think it takes two to tango. And having that toxic dynamic definitely got me into the mindset of where I was and why I did what I did.” 

She said she takes “full ownership” for the emotional affair. “I wish I never had, and I hope Jordan feels the same about how he treated me for a while,” she explained. “But yes, it took both of us to get there. I think having it come out publicly was a good wake-up call for us because it got us help.”

In a statement to PEOPLE, Jordan added that he takes “full accountability for the pain I caused Jessi during our marriage.”

As The Secret Lives of Mormon Lives season 3 tracks the ups and downs of Jessi and Jordan’s marriage, people are wondering: Is the couple still together? Here’s what to know.

Did Jessi have an affair with Marciano Brunette? 

In the season 3 premiere, Jessi admitted that she kissed Marciano, 32, twice and they carried on an emotional affair. She eventually called it off. She denied his allegation that they slept together, and later in the season, Marciano confirmed he was lying about it.

Jessi told PEOPLE that when allegations about her affair came up at the end of season 2, “I was terrified because I was like, ‘Oh no, this could be coming out.’ ” But the rumor that she and Marciano had been caught kissing in public was not true, and, instead, they kissed in a hotel room.

“But I was scared. I was like, ‘Oh no, maybe people just put two and two together. They figured it out,’ ” she said. “In that moment, I got through it, but I should have known that you can’t have secrets in reality TV. It just isn’t plausible.”

What has Jordan said about Jessi’s abuse allegations?

In episode four of the new season, the members of MomTok and their husbands are invited to Jessi and Jordan’s house for a barbecue — without Jessi. 

At the barbecue, Jordan admits he “acted extremely poorly” and that “it made us get to a place where it was extremely toxic.” He added that his behavior did not justify her affair and said there were “bad things on both sides.”

In a statement to PEOPLE, Jordan said, “I take full accountability for the pain I caused Jessi during our marriage. At that time in my life, I was deeply unhealed, and as the saying goes, hurt people hurt people. That doesn’t excuse my behavior in any way, it’s something I’ve had to face and take full responsibility for.”

“Over the past year, I’ve been in consistent therapy and doing the hard work to understand the impact of my actions and to grow into a healthier, safer, and more self-aware person,” Jordan continued. “My focus now is on continued healing, being the best father and husband I can be, and making sure that the patterns of my past never repeat. I have deep remorse for the hurt I caused and so much respect for Jessi’s strength in continuing to fight for our marriage and family.”

What happens to Jordan and Jessi in season 3?

Ultimately, Jessi and Jordan decided to separate for 90 days. Throughout the season, their separation creates some awkward moments. During Mikayla Matthews’ birthday party in episode 2, Jessi reads aloud some of the texts between her and Marciano in an attempt to prove they never had sex, with Jordan in earshot behind her.

Jessi ultimately gets Marciano to agree to take a lie detector test with her, and afterward, they attend dinner with the other members of MomTok. When Jordan learns Jessi ate dinner with Marciano, he’s furious and they get into another fight.

“I’m not trying to purposely hurt him,” Jessi says in a talking head. “All I’m trying to do is prove my innocence and Jordan doesn’t seem to understand that.”

Later in the season, the couple attends Stagecoach music festival with the rest of MomTok and DadTok, and Jessi says she thinks seeing other couples who are struggling helped give them perspective.

Are Jordan and Jessi still together?

In the tenth and final episode of season 3, Jordan and Jessi sit down again at the end of their 90-day separation to discuss the future of their marriage. “I’m nervous,” Jessi says in a talking head. “I don’t feel quite ready to make this decision yet. I don’t know if I’m ever going to feel fully settled in this, but I do know that prolonging the separation isn’t going to do much and I’m probably not going to get that feeling of clarity unless I try one way or the other.”

Jordan tells Jessi their 90 days apart made him realize how much he loves her. “I want to make it work with you,” he says, adding, “I believe that we both deserve to put what’s happened behind us and try to move forward from it.”

Jessi admits that she’s been in “limbo of really not knowing what I wanted.” She says her “biggest fear” is that they will give their marriage another chance and “fall back into old patterns.” 

Jordan says he thinks he’s faced “some of the traumas from his past” in therapy and has begun to work through them. He explains in a talking head that he welcomed his first child, Peyton, now 13, when he was 18 years old. He and his ex decided to get married “because in Utah that’s what you do.” They soon divorced, leaving Jordan feeling “broken and unlovable.” He says that experience made him more controlling.

“In therapy, we’ve uncovered that a lot of your aggression comes from childhood wounds,” Jessi points out. She says she understands him better now, and while it doesn’t make his behavior OK, she “understands” it’s “changing.”

Jessi says that her past relationships made her “bury her emotions” and that therapy has helped her “feel human” again. She adds, “If we’re both putting the work in, we deserve to give it a chance and put that time and effort in to see if those changes can be long-lasting.”

Jordan says he’s willing to work through things because, “I want our family to be whole again.” The couple also shares daughter Jovi, 2½, and son Jagger, 5. 

Jessi says in a talking head that their culture places a lot of pressure on being “perfect,” which taught her to “go numb.” She explains, “If I’m going to make the marriage work, I need to drop that, and I’m willing to do that because Jordan has made so many changes and I want to make sure that I’m doing the same thing.”

She asks him if he’s ready to “officially” move back into their home, and he says he’s “over the moon” to try again. “I love you, and I’m glad that we’ve been able to work through things,” she says, before hugging her husband.

What have Jordan and Jessi said since The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season 3 was released?

Neither Jordan nor Jessi has spoken out about season 3 on social media yet.

Eagle-eyed fans noticed Jessi’s name on Instagram is now Jessi Draper, dropping her husband’s last name. Though Jordan recently commented on a Nov. 12 post Jessi made, writing simply, “HAWT 🔥.” He also shared an Instagram story of Jessi celebrating the season three premiere in New York’s Times Square.