Influencer Says People Should Block, Mute or Unfollow Their Ex (Exclusive)

Jahad Carter wants you to delete your ex. No, really.

The host of the “Hopeless Love Society” tells PEOPLE that, in today’s digital age, anyone who recently ended their relationship needs to both emotionally and digitally “detox” themselves from their former partner.

“It’s really like, how do I not continue to reach for someone that’s no longer there and that I can no longer express my love, care and affection towards, which can be especially hard during the digital age,” Carter shares. 

The 27-year-old influencer hosts a man-on-the-street-style series, “Hopeless Romantic Society,” online, and has built a platform by talking to people about their dating struggles.

Carter knows firsthand how hard it can be to find true connection, telling PEOPLE that he is recently single.

“It was a long-distance relationship, so for the most part, we did talk digitally, and I traveled maybe four hours to go see him one weekend after dating for six months,” he shares. “It was a great, amazing weekend, but it ended with him deciding that we were better off as friends.”

“When someone tells you what they’re looking for and what they’re not looking for, the best thing that you can do immediately is listen to them, feel that hurt and try not to run away from it or avoid it in any way. I feel like we live in a cavalier nonchalant epidemic,” he adds.

Carter dealt with the situation by implementing one of Instagram’s latest features, which allows you to remove topics from your feed. Carter decided to take control of his algorithm and remove all content about avoidance and relationships in general.

“When it comes to trying not to feed into the digital breadcrumbs of this specific person, Instagram helped me a lot. You can change the algorithm now to not feature certain topics that you may have shared or things that you are ruminating on in your head about a specific person that you’re thinking of,” Carter shares. 

He also recommends simply hitting the “unfollow” button.

“Some people are scared too, but if I’m not mad enough to block you, I also don’t wanna see that you like the reel that I’m about to tap on, or you’re in someone’s comments, or you’re even in my likes,” he says. “I’m about to cackle out loud to this reel, and I’m like, ‘Oh my God, this is so funny. Let me send it to my best friend.’ I’m bursting with euphoria. Then boom, I see your face. All of a sudden, my body feels like I’m going to war. and I’m remembering when things went bad.”

“I definitely would say if you’re really stuck on a person, it does not hurt to unfollow them for your own sake,” he adds.

If someone is hesitant to unfollow someone to avoid any awkwardness, he pointed to the power of muting them instead.

“Don’t follow their move, don’t follow every story post, note or comment that they’re leaving because still holding onto that relationship can almost feel like death by a million story posts,” he shares. “You don’t want your brain to constantly keep just trying to seek something that’s no longer there.”

Another thing he hopes to leave behind in 2025 is “posting like everything is perfect or happy to show your ex what they’re missing.” 

“It’s okay to just not post or just post your little depressing Pisces memes and go on about your day. We’re not acting like we’re okay no more. We’re done with that. We’re leaving that in the past.”

While he jokes that he won’t be posting a partner until marriage, he says there are ways to keep your feed free of exes — either by deleting or archiving old posts.

“I would definitely archive it if you can, if you want to, even if your little sisters are in it as well. I’m sorry that was a really beautiful photo between us that you’re in a spread or whatever, but definitely take it down if you feel like it’s best for you.” 

While a lot of people exit relationships with hopes of remaining friends, Carter warns that more often than not, intentions don’t align.

“Sometimes that friendship that’s offered can be something that’s offered in a very vain way, and we have to be frank that there are a lot of connections out there or people out there who really seek connections or seek intimacy with a person as a form of currency and a form of consumption,” he says. “Sometimes they need validation in an egotistical way to stay connected or have access to a person and still go out and gather and gain even more forms of intimacy in different ways.”

He understands that “sometimes” a friendship between exes can work, but emphasizes that there needs to be “a mutual understanding” about boundaries.

“It can’t be lopsided because if there’s an imbalance, then this issue is always gonna come up, and the imbalance can always leave one person always seeking more of a connection and another person always either trying to receive and giving breadcrumbs to continue receiving it,” Carter shares. “That imbalance is something we need to avoid if we are open to continuing a friendship, whatever that looks like. It has started from a very whole new place a lot of times.”